A sweaty first impression

Author: Single. Approachable. Girl.
October 21, 2010

In my attempt to simmer down about the date, I left work a little later than I should have. classic short womens ugg boots When I got home, I only had only 5 minutes to re-apply make-up and get out the door. Lebron James I had chosen a location that I could walk to, which means I should have left time to actually walk there – a detail I did not realize until I got home at 7:45 for my 8 PM date taking place 3 1/2 blocks away.


I had planned on changing clothes but with only 5 minutes to get ready I had to make the executive decision to leave my outfit as is (”outfit” being a very loose term) and focus on my face. I finished make-up at 7:54 and got a text message from him saying, “hey there. Just got here. no rush.”


Damn. UGG Kids Outlet I grabbed my purse and jacket and I started out down the street.


Now – I don’t know about you, but when I know that someone is waiting on me, my adrenaline kicks in and I pick up the pace…sometimes by a lot. If I’m being honest with you, I ran half way there. BIG mistake.


By the time I got there and sat down I felt pretty hot – and not in the good way. It came to my attention within the first two minutes that I my face was sweating. Unfortunately for me, it came to his attention to.


“Did you run here?”


“No. ugg classic mini sale Well…not really. I may have been speed walking. new balance 1600 I just…knew that you were already here…and…ok. I did run a little bit. You know what? I’m going to go to the bathroom real quick and…ah…wash my hands.”


If you’re hoping that this situation came off as endearing, I can assure you, it didn’t. Nothing looks more eager and desperate than running to your blind date.


When I walked into the bathroom a girl asked me if it was raining outside. I wish I had taken a picture of her face when I explained to her that the drops of water on my forehead were sweat.


Girl in the bathroom: “Oh. nike air max 2016 It’s not that bad. You’re not here with a boy are you?”


S. A. G.: “Ahhhh”


Girl in the bathroom: “Oh dear. cheap ugg boots uk Let me help you.”


She then preceded to wet a paper towel and pat my forehead. When she was done she said, “That’s better. The good news is, you smell good. That’s all that really matters.”


I spent the remainder of the date trying to recover and be “cool” but it’s safe to say that “cool” was not going to be an option last night. Shortly after I sat down again, he asked me which small plates I would like to share and I accidentally over-explained why I don’t eat cheese/dairy. asics cheap You know your elderly relative who launches into detailed explanations of digestive problems? It sounded something like that.


I’m not sure if sweaty and gassy are qualities that are going to have this guy beating down my door.


It’s rough out there

Author: Single. Approachable. Girl.
May 7, 2010

Two weeks ago, when I arrived 4 minutes late for the sweaty blind date, I found my date standing up at a nearby table talking with two girls. I didn’t think too much of it at first, but when we sat down he told me that they were inviting him to sit with them because it looked as though he had been stood up. Sheesh. Can’t a girl leave a cute guy waiting for 5 minutes without two single-girl vultures swooping in? It’s getting pretty brutal out here for us single girls.


Well, last night, I attended a Cinco De Mayo singles dating event and it became clear to me that almost losing my date to two girls at the bar was just scraping the surface of  the competitive dating scene in Los Angeles. It’s one thing to be on eHarmony meeting guys and knowing that they are meeting other girls on eHarmony as well. It’s quite another to all be in the same room together.


That said, I learned last night that the #1 girl in the way of my own dating prowess, is me.


The event was a casual “group date” with an even number of girls and boys and an interactive activity to break-the-ice. Last night’s activity was margarita mixing and it took place at an art gallery.


I walked in right on time (BTW – I’ll be on-the-nose from now on) and there were two other girls there. They both looked me up and down immediately. I’m thinking I got a little nervous – always a big mistake.


Girl #1: I like your…(one more up-and-down glance)…shirt.


S.A.G: Thank you. Actually, it’s a wool tunic (with a smile).


Girl #1 (straight faced): I don’t understand.


S.A.G.: I was just joking…I think it’s funny…to wear a wool tunic…and to say “wool tunic”…nevermind.


Girl #1 and Girl #2 turn to each other and start talking and ignore me completely.


Later, while mixing margaritas I spilled a bunch of agave (very sticky) and then I dropped a glass on the floor. The music might as well have come to a screeching halt. THEN I dropped a metal margarita shaker top. Again, no breakage, but it was just as loud. Come on, S.A.G.


Then I made the mistake of telling a divorce joke…to a group of singles at a dating event.


It was originally told by a man on his fifth marriage (I heard it 3rd hand). He tells younger guys that they shouldn’t get married, just find a woman they don’t like and buy her a house.


Yeah. Crickets.


Wrong audience maybe?


At this point, the other girls were probably thinking about the following quote: “Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.”


So once the margarita making was over, we headed across the street and something fairly shocking happened, considering.


As soon as we got there, one of the cuter guys at the event – who happens to own a sail boat – pulled me aside and said, “Hey. I have not had enough to eat. Are you hungry?”


S.A.G.: I can always eat.


(Seriously, S.A.G. What is wrong with you?)


Cute Guy with a Boat: “Would you want to get a table and grab some food with me?”


Now. This was my first singles dating event, but I’m pretty sure I had just achieved the ultimate outcome for a competitive dater at a singles dating event: the request for “alone time.” Isn’t that what the girl’s on The Bachelor are always fighting for – aside from a rose? I was half expecting some other girl from the event to come over half way through the meal and ask to “steal” Cute Guy with a Boat away.


Happily, that didn’t happen. We just sat there and shared small plates.


So – there you have it. I may have dropped multiple bar items on the floor and told jokes that resulted in dead silence, but I survived my first singles dating event with”alone time” and a request for a 2nd date.


I feel like I should have come home with a rose.



THE-BACHELOR


Is It Wrong To Fall Asleep On A 2nd Date?

Author: Single. Approachable. Girl.
November 27, 2009

You decide:


I recently went out with a guy and while date #1 had it’s fair share of red flags, it took date #2 to show me the light.


First Date Red Flags:
#1: He chose a dinner location around the corner from his house and a good 10 miles from mine.


#2: The inner thigh of my jeans ripped while exiting my car at the restaurant valet – I believe the universe was raising a red flag for me. (Side note: A woman walked in on me while I was taking this picture – leg up on the sink – in the restaurant bathroom. It only showcases 1/2 of the rip).


First-Date Jean RIp

#3: During dinner, he reached across the table, pointed to and physically touched a zit I had covered up on my forehead and asked if it was a scar. I mean…not only did he notice it, he made mention of it and forced me to admit to my B-looking girl, adult acne on a first date.


#4: He surprise kissed me 3 times, to which I would unconsciously and uncomfortably react with an “oh dear” just before he kissed me.


#5: At 11 PM on this Monday night date, he asked me if I wanted come over to his house and to watch this random independent film where the leading lady shares my first name.


After all of that, I still accepted date #2 to go see that independent film at a once-a-month-showing in a theater. I figured it would be a cultural experience and could avoid any more invitations to go to his house to watch it.


Little did I know that it would be a midnight showing of “one of the worst films ever made” (according to Wikipedia) at a theater 20 miles away from my house. cheap mu Legend zen Not only did this film have a following of obnoxious people who waited in line for 2 hours to get a good seat and insisted on yelling throughout the screening, it was essentially a soft-core porn, cast with unattractive people. I wanted to leave the instant it started. adidas femme soldes How could he fail to mention the numerous poorly-shot naked sex scenes when “selling me” on the date?


In hindsight, I should have simply left, but at the time I felt trapped and so…since it was 1 AM and I was in a dark room looking for an escape from the experience, I allowed myself to fall asleep.


Let us pray

Author: Single. Approachable. Girl.
November 7, 2009

Last night I went out with the “perfect” guy. Seriously.


He is smart, funny, tall, handsome, a children’s charity volunteer, a great dancer and – as I learned when he took my hand and asked that we pray before dinner – a devout christian.


I can’t say that I was totally comfortable with the idea of thanking God for fish and chips on a first date, but I took his hand, bowed my head and said a little prayer to myself…


Our father, in dating heaven

Humor be thy name

Thy virgin come

Thy will be done

With this date, before it’s begun

 

Give us this girl another round

And forgive me my judgment

As I forgive those who take me to late-night, soft-core porn

 

Lead him not to temptation

But deliver me the next on your list

For thy may be single, approachable and amused forever

 

Oy-men


What comes first? The children or the 2nd date?

Author: Single. Approachable. Girl.
October 28, 2009

When I was in college, I visited a friend of mine at her sorority house and her roommate had a pair of baby shoes with little hearts on them hanging from her closet door. nike air max pas cher An odd thing to see in a sorority house, for sure.


When I inquired, she beamed, “My boyfriend gave those to me for valentines day. He said they are our baby’s first pair of shoes.”


They’d been dating for 2 years, but were not married, not pregnant, and had no actual baby plans in the near future…this is strange, right?


Well, I can now top it. Potentially two times over – as of one minute ago.


I went on a first date with Twice-Engaged Guy and mentioned in passing that I liked to sing. new balance mens His response was, “I’ve always wanted children that can sing.”


A joke, perhaps? I assumed so and laughed with him.Later on the date – while eating tacos at an outdoor taco stand – he asked, “So, what do you think our children will be like?” (In case your wondering, he has three children in mind)


Now, at this point I’m getting confused. oakley homme pas cher Does he have a shockingly-funny sense of humor? Does he think that this is something desperate women want to hear? Which would also mean, by the way, that he considers me desperate. asics shoes Or, is he seriously considering the talent-range of our children before we’ve completed date #1?


A “?” has been looming over me as I try to figure out how grey this guy’s grey area is. We’re married before meeting, have 3 kids during the 1st date…what’s next? Am I going to show up to a surprise 2nd date anniversary party with all my family and friends because he secretly stole the address book from my phone while I was in the bathroom??


So – fast forward to one minute ago (or however long it took me to write the above). air max 2016 I’m sitting at home on a Friday night with Indian delivery food – hey at least I’m not farming – and I post something on Facebook about my awesome “me” night. nike air max thea Within minutes I have a text message from Twice-Engaged Guy asking about my night and why he wasn’t invited. new balance 998 I repeat to him that tonight is my night.


He replies with the following text: “Lame! I still love u though”


(cue the speechless silence)

(cue the uncomfortable silence)

(Single. Approachable. asics shoes Girl. nike air max pas cher turns off her phone, gets up, checks the deadbolt on the front door and eases back onto the couch with her naan and Saag Alu)


Another one bites the dust.


The Waiter Friend

Author: Single. Approachable. Girl.
June 23, 2009

In LA, most people have friends that are actors. The actors are typically “up-and-coming” and therefore, also waiters. Transitive property would lead to: most people in LA have friends that are waiters (I apologize, servers).


I should not have been surprised with The Texter (whose persistence finally got me on a first date) took me to a restaurant where a friend of his just happened to be our server. I can’t really blame him, since I came to learn over the dinner that not only has Texter only lived in LA for one year but he is only one year out of college (dear God). I give him props for finding a way to take a date to a nice restaurant affordably.


Texter was pretty sly about it, I will admit. He had given me two options for dinner and I had chosen this particular restaurant over the other. When asked if he had friends at both restaurants, he said no, and emphasized that this was “less of a friend” and more of “an acquaintance.”


As I came to learn, having your date’s acquaintance as a waiter can be a good or bad thing, depending on how well you like your date. For example, had I liked Texter, the extra tasting of wine before the meal, complimentary dessert and then surprise nightcap drink after dessert would have been a delightful way to spend a long, conversation-filled first date. Since our conversation was riddled with pauses followed by filler, such as “where do your siblings live?” I would have to say that the waiter friend freebies made for one loooong dinner.


That same night, when Texter tried to befriend me on Facebook, I found on his open Facebook page that his serving “acquaintance” was in 50%-75% of his posted pictures.