Hot Married Bartender Guy

Author: Single. Approachable. Girl.
July 17, 2011

About  month ago, I had my birthday party at my favorite bar in Santa Monica. When we first got there, I was pleased to find that the bartender in charge of my party was the dark and handsome bartender I had noticed a time or two before.  I was simultaneously displeased to find a ring on his left ring finger. Do hot bartenders get married? I was very confused.

Regardless, he was a good bartender and clearly he knew who was signing the tab because he was very attentive to me and always made sure my bottle of champagne was on ice and within an arms reach. (I do realize how ridiculous that sounds)

Throughout the night he would occasionally flirt with the birthday girl with the open tab (smart) and I couldn’t help but flirt back. Apparently, I’m a sucker for dark, mysterious eyes, unkempt facial hair and a pseudo hip-looking wavy mullet (that’s right). I’m not married and so I don’t know all the rules, but I hear flirting is OK. right?

Two weeks later I came back and he was tending bar. When I sat down I said I couldn’t filter myself and said, “Do you remember me? I had my party here a couple of weeks ago?”

Hot Married Bartender Guy (taking my hand and leaning in so I could hear his raspy deep voice): Of course I remember you.

Oish. This is not good.

S.A.G.: Well, I’ll have a Chimay, but then I’m going to leave you for that booth over there

Hot Married Bartender Guy: Oh! You’re leaving me? (giving a disappointed look)

S.A.G.: That’s right. I’ll be over there. (Get me out of here before this gets out of hand.)

I sat down, wrote a blog entry and then came back to the bar where – if you recall – I met Marine Biologist Guy. As we were chatting, I couldn’t help but notice all the girls at the bar flirting with the hot, married bartender. I had heard of this happening, but I had never  witnessed girls flocking to a ring like this before. At least I had the decency to attempt not to flirt.

I must have mentioned something to the Marine Biologist Guy because next time the bartender came our way, we asked him if girls flirt with him more now that he’s married than before he was married.

Hot Married Bartender Guy: What?! I’m not married.

Well. This just got interesting…

S.A.G.: How do explain the ring on your ring finger?

Hot Married Bartender Guy went on to explain the ring belonged to his grandfather and it only fits that one finger. Upon closer inspection, I realized the ring really did not resemble a wedding ring.

S.A.G.: You’re an idiot. Do you have any idea how many girls you’re missing out on because they think you’re married?

I jokingly point to myself.

He immediately starts tugging on the ring. It was stuck.

S.A.G.: Well, don’t take it off now. You’ll lose it. (and the other girls at the bar will catch on)

I wasn’t quite sure what to do with this new-found information. He is either adorably clueless or the smartest, sneakiest bartender/philanderer of all time. I mean, it would be fairly genius to make girls think they don’t have a chance with you, flirt with them so they wish that they did and then unveil that they actually do.

I would put my money on smart/sneaky…but that didn’t stop me from coming back to the bar two weeks later.

More to come…

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